Being defined as a Good Mummy is something we all aspire to. But the title really lacks definition and is open to interpretation. Us mummys know that being a mother is a 24 hour a day seven day week proposition. There are no off buttons, job descriptions, performance standards or feedback, other than mummys and kiddos surviving the day in one piece. The pressure to excel is constant and aggravated in todays “Mummys must have it all, do it all and in heels, looking fabulous” culture. When things get a bit cray cray and the wheels fall off the bus, here are my tips for keeping it Mummy Real!
Good Mummys Define Their Own Truth
To be a Good Mummy requires some honesty and introspection. You don’t have to undergo a detailed personality assessment to get it. Just knowing yourself and being honest with yourself is the key. Are you and introvert mummy who likes her own time or and extrovert who thrives on others company? Who are you at your core? What energizes you and what depletes you? Who are you at your most joyful and free ? For that matter, who are you at your ugliest most naked moments?
Good Mummys Know Their Strength and Weaknesses
Good Mummys know their limits. Good Mummys know if the are patient or not. Good Mummys know if they have a sense of humor, or not. Good Mummys know their buttons and how to offset a Mummy Meltdown. Good Mummys know if they are exceptional organizers or the most fun and unstructured mom on the block. Good Mummys embrace their superpowers and those that aren’t so super. Good Mummys don’t fight to excel at everything, but take a step back. Where they fall short, they find Mummy Friends and other resources for support and understanding.
Good Mummys Can Say NO
Good Mummys have a sense of balance in their lives. They understand the delicate dance that is family life and work to maintain that. They understand the benefits of limits and are comfortable defining their boundaries for themselves and others. Good Mummies say yes to NO!
Good Mummys Know The Value of Self Care and Support Others Self Care Too
Good Mummys know that they need to put on their oxygen masks first. Tired? They rest. Hungry? They eat. Depleted? They call a friend, attend church, meditate, go to a yoga class, watch Real Housewives. They do whatever is needed to reset the Mummy Thermostat to the right temperature. Good Mummys also recognize when others in their tribe need self care too. Their Mummy Friends know that they can be counted on to step up and take the kids for and hour for reciprocated breaks and Mummy Time Outs.
Good Mummys Don’t Judge
Good Mummys don’t care if others go breast or bottle, promote screen time or none, go private, public or home school, stay at home, work part time or full. Good Mummys don’t care about cloth diapers or disposables, organic foods versus McDonalds. There are no bad choices in Mummydom and therefore there is no need for judgement, of themselves or others. Good Mummys know to keep it real and recognize that there is strength and sustenance in the shared Mummy Experience. Regardless of the good, the bad and the ugly, Good Mummys respect themselves and others as part of the Mummy Tribe.